Chapter 121: A Bunch of Buffoonish Bodhisattvas

The initiation of the Sand Monk went remarkably smoothly. Having heard the full account of the events, Xuanzang thought: since it was the will of Guanyin Bodhisattva and it meant gaining another disciple, why not? Thus, the demon of the Flowing Sands River was given the name Sha Seng.

With the journey about to resume, Zhu Bajie immediately tossed the luggage to Sha Seng, chuckling, "Junior Brother Sha, from now on, the task of carrying the luggage is yours. Any objections?"

As the youngest disciple, even if he had any objections, what could he do? He had to bear them in silence. Who else but the newest and youngest should handle the dirty, tiring work? Sha Seng, a man of few words, or perhaps one could say reticent, took the luggage tossed over by the pig-headed monk without a single word of complaint.

Finally, Sha Seng cast a spell over the Flowing Sands River, parting the turbulent, murky waters in two and creating a path across the riverbed. The others were astonished and happily hurried across.

By dusk, there were no villages or towns in sight, and with the sun setting, they could no longer continue their journey. Sun Wukong, who had been scouting ahead, was not in the least bit worried, but Xuanzang and his companions were beginning to fret. Spending the night in the wilderness meant dealing with swarms of insects and dangerous beasts, which was no pleasant experience.

Xuanzang spurred his horse forward and asked, "Benefactor Sun, the day is drawing to a close, and we have seen no sign of any household along the way. Are we truly to spend the night in the wilderness?"

"Don't be impatient, Monk. Let's walk a bit further; who knows what pleasant surprises might await us?"

*As the mountains twist and the paths turn, there must be a village hidden behind the flowers and willows.*

Heh! The four Bodhisattvas must be about to make their appearance, thought Sun Wukong, filled with anticipation.

After walking a short while, the path took a turn, and suddenly, a household appeared. With wisps of cooking smoke curling into the air and the chirping of livestock, it looked like a fine place to rest.

Heh! These Bodhisattvas are truly idle; it seems they have nothing better to do. Otherwise, why would they transform into a matron and offer their three beautiful "daughters" to these monks? Just to test their resolve on the journey to the Western Heaven?

Bah! How melodramatic! How ridiculous! How amusing! These four Bodhisattvas are a bunch of clowns! Sun Wukong’s inner monologue was rich with irony.

Following custom, it was Sun Wukong’s turn to "knock on the door." He rapped on the gate with a nonchalant air. With a creak, the door opened to reveal a modestly dressed woman who exclaimed, "Ah... are you... a monkey?"

The woman pretended to be startled. A normal person would not react this way; despite the supposed fright, her expression remained calm.

Damn it! How bored must they be to play these games? If not for the foresight provided by the Immortal Venerable, Sun Wukong might have been more restrained, rather than staring at the woman with unbridled impudence, the corners of his mouth curled into a high arc. "Oh, my apologies. My appearance didn't frighten you, did it?"

The woman patted her chest, again feigning terror. "You... you... what is this..."

"Amitabha! Good day, Benefactor. This humble monk is traveling from the Great Tang in the East and has passed through your esteemed lands. As the hour is late, I wonder if you might allow us to stay the night? How virtuous, how virtuous!"

Xuanzang, who had caught up, spoke in a refined and scholarly tone. Sun Wukong struggled mightily to suppress his laughter; it was truly a difficult task. It was clearly nothing more than a staged performance, yet everyone insisted on pretending they were strangers.

Once the woman saw Xuanzang, she immediately switched to a different, smiling face. "Oh, so you are monks from the Great Tang in the East? Very well, please come in. However... I must warn you, I have three daughters at home, and they are quite playful. If they should..."

"Benefactor, it is of no concern. We shall only stay for the night and depart at dawn. We apologize for the intrusion!" Xuanzang spoke with such grace that the woman could not stop smiling. "Oh, Monk, don't be so formal. Since you are guests, there is no need for my daughters to hide."

The group entered the main hall. "Daughters, come quickly to greet our guests!"

At the woman's call, three women emerged gracefully. Each was a peerless beauty, looking unlike any mortal woman. Xuanzang blushed instantly.

Zhu Bajie stared intently at the three women, drooling. He thought to himself: This is truly excessive. How are they all even more beautiful than Cuilan? Why? They are truly breathtaking beauties. I love it! Come into Brother Pig's bowl!

Compared to Zhu Bajie’s unsightly drooling, Sha Seng stood still as a wooden statue. Only Sun Wukong watched the play unfold.

"Monk, come, take a look at my three daughters. Are they beautiful? Are they pretty? Do you like them?" The woman joyfully pushed her three "daughters" forward, scaring Xuanzang into backing away step by step. "Amitabha! A sin, a sin! This poor monk is a man of the cloth, and I have already forsaken the worldly desires. You must not do this, Benefactor."

"Heh, Monk, my three daughters are beautiful enough to put the moon to shame and topple cities. Are you truly not moved in the slightest?" The woman laughed happily. "As long as you choose one of the three, I, as their mother, will provide a dowry. I will bestow upon you countless gold and silver, thousands of acres of fertile land, and let you live in luxury, eating rare delicacies for the rest of your life. How about it, Monk? Are you tempted? Why not act now?"

"Ah... Master, don't hesitate anymore! What a wonderful thing this is! If it were up to me, I'd take all three of these young ladies..."

Bah! Multiple-choice questions? That is for elementary schoolers. In the adult world, we take them all.

(Elementary schoolers are caught in the crossfire: "Being us is just too hard!")

"Heh, tell me, old mother, if the monk really makes a choice and takes one of your three daughters as his wife, would you really agree?" Sun Wukong decided to join in the fun. You four Bodhisattvas have certainly gone to great lengths for this melodramatic play.

The woman glanced at Sun Wukong and smiled. "That goes without saying. As long as this monk nods, I will marry my daughter to him immediately, and they shall enter the bridal chamber tonight."

"What? Enter... enter the bridal chamber? Master, what are you waiting for? Quickly nod and agree! If you ask me...