Chapter 9: Boss, Your Snake Has Become Sentient!
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“Sir, do you like this little hamster?” The saleswoman’s voice pulled Chi Feichi back from his thoughts.
He realized he had been staring at the hamster in the glass enclosure for quite some time. He glanced again at the hamster. “No, I just noticed this hamster’s legs are shorter than the healthy mice we studied in class, almost five millimeters shorter, and its hind legs are too thin…”
The saleswoman, Dou Dou, looked confused.
Chi Feichi continued, “When it grows up, it will look better than other hamsters because a fatter hamster resembles a little dumpling, but because of that, it tends to be less active. If the hamster itself dislikes exercise, its health will be worse than other hamsters.”
The saleswoman quickly explained, “You studied lab mice in class, right? Their legs are generally a bit longer than hamsters’…”
“No, I study veterinary medicine. Compared to lab mice, we mostly observe common pets,” Chi Feichi replied.
The saleswoman wiped her sweat; well, since he studied veterinary medicine, he must be able to tell the difference between a hamster and a lab mouse…
This hamster, compared to others, did indeed dislike exercise.
Under the somewhat disappointed gaze of the saleswoman, Chi Feichi left the pet store and continued walking forward.
Not far ahead, he heard a spirited shout:
“Snakes for sale! Snakes for sale! Roll over, act cute, hunt on their own! Cheap red-bellied snakes, only two thousand yen, two thousand yen! Take home a rare, intelligent mutant red-bellied snake!”
Chi Feichi: “…”
He used to hear such street cries often back home, but in Japan… in the memories he inherited, never once.
Even during mall promotions, it was always some girl reciting lines in a formulaic way. This kind of nostalgic hometown atmosphere was a first for him!
So, he stopped and turned around.
At the street-side shop, the owner was busy sweeping with his head down.
Inside the glass partition by the door, a gray and black snake stood upright, its black eyes fixed on him, tongue flickering happily.
At first glance, quite intimidating.
However, the creature seemed to say, “Sir, want to buy a snake? I’m cheap, only two thousand yen, not even enough for a good meal outside. I don’t bite, just please don’t feed me loaches anymore. Or if you don’t want me to hunt on my own, that’s fine too. I’m very easy to care for~”
Chi Feichi fell silent for a moment and entered the shop. “Boss…”
Your snake has become sentient!
“Ah, welcome!” The owner quickly set aside the broom.
This was a specialty pet shop selling unusual animals—snakes, lizards, spiders. The moment you stepped in, the temperature seemed to drop noticeably.
But the owner was quite friendly. “Are you looking to buy a pet?”
Snake: “Look here! Look here!”
Chi Feichi glanced over and saw the snake turn around in the glass box, still staring intently at him.
The owner’s face darkened briefly but hurriedly explained, “Most pets in our shop are quite docile. This snake likes to stare at people, but it means no harm…”
The snake snapped coldly, “If I can’t sell the pet, don’t blame me. If you sell me, do you think I’d keep staring at the buyer? Even if I don’t sell, at least change my diet! I’ve been fed loaches for three years! I’m easy to care for!”
Chi Feichi ignored the ‘snake talk’ and observed, “This snake’s pattern looks like a red-bellied snake, but it has no red at all. What species is it?”
The owner cleared his throat awkwardly and took out a booklet. “It is indeed a red-bellied snake. We have a certificate from the breeding farm; every snake is registered. Its parents are purebred red-bellied snakes. Look here…”
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Chi Feichi looked down. The booklet had detailed registration information.
This snake’s parents were numbered and photographed; their colors were vivid red and black with no gray. How this one turned gray-black was a mystery.
The owner continued to pitch, “Actually, this snake is quite good. Usually, red-bellied snakes have a rotten fishy smell, but this one is almost odorless and very clean.”
Chi Feichi looked the owner straight in the eye, “Although red-bellied snakes are classified as non-venomous, they are mildly venomous rear-fanged snakes. Their venom is basically harmless to humans, but mutations might produce dangerous toxins.”
It was hard to identify the breed, and there was no guarantee the mutation wouldn't be harmful, which was probably why the snake hadn’t sold.
The owner was speechless.
How to handle a knowledgeable customer?
The snake flicked its tongue wildly: “Sir, I don’t bite!”
Chi Feichi ignored it and said to the owner, “This snake must be at least three years old, right? Red-bellied snakes live about 6.1 years. Even if I take good care of it, I can only raise it for around three more years.”
The owner was at a loss.
The snake protested, “No, no, no, I feel great and very young!”
Chi Feichi continued, “Also, adult red-bellied snakes tend to be temperamental. Usually, people buy them as juveniles or hatchlings and raise them from a young age, which makes them docile when fully grown.”
The owner was speechless again.
The snake said, “I’ve watched people come and go since I was little. I’m very friendly and have a great personality!”
Chi Feichi sighed at the dumbfounded owner.
No wonder it hasn’t sold; even your nerve is thinner than a snake’s…
The owner awkwardly smiled and changed the subject. “Actually, you can look at others. We also have normal red-bellied snakes. Oh, and corn snakes—they’re docile and can live up to 15 years, very suitable as pets…”
The snake flopped down weakly. “Sir, look at me again, I’ve been fed nothing but little loaches for three years! Just because my color is strange… it’s killing me…”
“No need to look further,” Chi Feichi called the owner who was about to lead him away, “I’ll take this one.”
The owner was stunned, surprised to look at the glass box.
The snake immediately stood upright again, its eyes fixed on Chi Feichi.
“How much?” Chi Feichi asked.
The owner snapped back to reality, quoted a flat price: two thousand yen, including a care manual and certificate, plus a transparent plastic carrying box. He sold the snake almost as if casting out a plague, gratefully watching Chi Feichi leave.
The snake really knew its own value—it hadn’t been mistaken before.
Outside, Chi Feichi turned into a nearby alley and placed the plastic box on the ground.
Inside, the snake lazily lay flicking its tongue. “Little mouse, little frog, little chick, little fish… what are you doing?!”
Chi Feichi grabbed the snake’s critical spot and lifted it up, examining it.
Before… no, until he met this snake, he had never thought of keeping a snake.
Even if he wanted to train an assistant, snakes had many drawbacks.
Snakes couldn’t see well at night; they mainly used their tongue to sense vibrations or their built-in heat sensors to perceive the surroundings. Searching for inanimate objects was almost useless.
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Moreover, snakes generally have low intelligence, mostly acting on instinct. The smartest are probably cobras, but even if he wanted one, he couldn’t forget what happened with those.
Snakes also fear cold and require hibernation.
Originally, he preferred cats or birds—animals more convenient for investigation, communicating and training them to help gather information…
But this guy is smart, almost as smart as a human.
The snake allowed Chi Feichi to hold it with no resistance. If it bit him and got sent back, that’d be minor; the key was that Chi Feichi was holding its vital point!
What was this guy trying to do?
It heard people ate anything; could it be…
In the dim alley, man and snake gazed at each other. Both human eyes and snake pupils were calm and indifferent, but their thoughts had already spun around several times.
Finally, Chi Feichi broke the silence, pulling a keychain from his pocket. “Can you see what I’m holding?”
The snake stared for a while, flicked its tongue, and muttered, “Playing with a snake? Maybe he’s one of those ‘snake-obsessed’ humans people talk about… Will there be no loaches to eat anymore? Life is so hard…”
Chi Feichi’s face darkened slightly. His voice was low, “I don’t know if life is hard for you, but I’ll count to three. If you don’t answer my question by then, I promise you’ll be on the dining table tomorrow.”
The snake suddenly raised its head. Its round eyes showed no emotion but it was clearly startled.
Chi Feichi began counting, “One, two…”
Snake: “I can! I can! I can! I can see it—it’s keys, right? I know this thing!”
Chi Feichi nodded, then thought a moment. “You know it? So, you can see clearly at night, but the question is whether you recognize what you see?”
“I can see…” After surprise, the snake seemed suddenly delighted, nodding rapidly like a little chick pecking rice, “Actually, I know quite a few things. See, I know when you humans say ‘yes’ or ‘correct’ by nodding like this…”
Chi Feichi: “…”
This… no, this silly creature!
Among the snake’s drawbacks, low intelligence was not one. If it could see at night, hibernation wouldn’t be such a problem—he was lazy about going out in winter anyway.
Thinking about it, snakes had quite a few advantages.
Feed once a week, no need to walk around…
The snake shook its head until a bit dizzy, then stopped and sighed, “Since birth, this is the first time I’ve communicated with another living being. Humans don’t understand what I say or realize I’m imitating them. My kind can’t understand me either; they just wander, hunt, and rest…”
Chi Feichi looked into those seemingly emotionless snake eyes, feeling a faint stir in his heart before quickly regaining composure. His tone softened a little, “My name is Chi Feichi, i ke hi oso.”
He set the snake down, took out a pen and notebook, tore off a page, and wrote words, katakana, and romanization, placing the note beside the snake’s eyes.
“You’ll be called Fei Chi, hi a ka…” He tore another page with writing and placed it next to the first note, “Perfect for a red-bellied snake that isn’t red—it suits you well.”
Fei Chi focused intently and nodded, but this time without complaining.